After 9/11/11..... My Daughter and Me and Our Wonderful Day

On 9/11/11 my daughter, Anna, and I joined up with my sister, niece, and a couple of their family members and friends at the local parade for Windmill Weekend. It was fun to watch the kids get excited for the parade as we settled our bottoms onto the sidewalk and gave them each a plastic bag for flying candy coming from the parade floats.

A couple of the older children were watching the Ipod, but the two youngest, Anna and my niece's cousin, ages 8 and 6 respectively, were readying themselves for what they were going to do and say to get the most candy in their bags. They patiently awaited the parade as cars from out of state kept the highway open and delayed all of the action.

We reminded the kids to cover their ears as the sirens on the fire trucks, ambulances and police cars would be the first vehicles out! Smoky the Bear would be riding on one of our town's fire engine's!

My daughter kept yelling that she was excited for the men in skirts with the big sacks of skin... that would be the men in kilts with the bagpipes. They always bring me into a peaceful and sometimes somber place, but I love their music nonetheless. Of course after my Anna's yells, the 6 year old had to yell for men in skirts too! It was funny! Then the boy kept making gestures with his arm for trucks to honk their horns and finally a big tour bus let out a big noisy honk and that soon evaporated as the smell of diesel passed by us low-sitters on the sidewalk. Most days you wouldn't dare sit anywhere close to this highway, let alone try to cross it! It's known for being a dangerous road with many accidents in its history, but today is special. Today is Windmill Weekend's day of the parade. It has also been 10 years since the tragedy of 9/11.

Today is the 10 year anniversary of the planes crashing into the World Trade Center Buildings, one nearly crashing into the Pentagon and one that altered its course on the way to the White House. It was September 11th, 2001. Terrorists had plotted something evil and had taken over the air. My husband was activated that day and got to see the fighter jets take off from Otis Air Force Base on Cape Cod where he was stationed.

I'm sure many of us can remember where we were and what we were doing when all of this happened. I was just arriving at work and the television was on. It was a little fence company and I asked if what I was seeing was a joke and noticed that when my bosses looked up, no one was laughing. Disbelief was what I felt.... how could this be happening? In our country? To our people???? How?

I know that many people lost loved ones in the World Trade Center buildings, in the rubble of the aftermath of explosions, from heroic acts to save people from the attacks, from the planes that went down, trying to protect our country while fighting terrorists on a plane, and further down the road at war. No one can replace these heroes, these loved ones, but we can honor their memories. We can honor and love the survivors and learn to be tolerant.
We can go down the road in hate and want retribution that is killing our own at war and in our own streets, or we can open our minds and hearts and fill them with love. I prefer the latter choice.

As I watched the children during the parade, eyes lighting up, cheering the more the adults cheered, I felt a tenderness toward all of them. I felt like we were all akin. I felt protective, yet I knew I had to let them live and be as free as they could be. Go grab the candy kids and if you can't get it, I will get it for you! They loved the old cars and the floats with the sharks on them. It's exciting to see sharks on floats these days as the great white sharks have become a new delight as they have started to dine more and more on fat seals on the ocean side of our Cape Cod. We all shouted out, 'Go sharks,' whenever we saw one of those floats! No one cheered for the National Seashore's piping plover. It probably tasted like chicken anyway. That's another controversy I will not get into right now.

It was exciting to see the children cheer for the bands and smile and wave at them with their American flags proudly waving. They clapped and cheered and probably didn't understand that this is the America that I want them to love. This is the place I want them to be able to live in and enjoy their freedom in without the threat of terrorism. I will never stop being vigilant, but I will not stop living ever again.

After the parade with the floats, dancing, singing, bands, and big official vehicles as well as oldsters, we carefully crossed the highway and headed toward our cars. Cousins hugged, my sister and I hugged, we all told each other how much we loved one another and promised to see everyone very soon, and we will! Life is too short to waste time on not seeing family and friends.

My daughter and I proceeded to drive to the Provincelands instead of going to the Windmill Square and see people from her school and people I don't really care to see. I just don't do well with people. Today was about finding peace. Since her Dad's death in 2007, after his exposure to the war from 2002 to 2003, finding peace for the two of us has been vital, as well as keeping an odd sense of humour about us.

We found the National Seashore's Beech Forest Trail pretty much the way we find it every year. It was sunny and in the mid 70s and the animals were afoot on the trails. Between the flora and the fauna, I'm not sure which was more exciting! Since my girl's stay at the Audubon Camp, she showed me plants and animal habitats she learned about. She even showed me the "chicken finger" shaped leaves of the Sassafrass trees and how they tasted if you sucked on the step of a leaf. She was very proud of all she had learned and expressed her desire to go back and learn more about this place we call home.

We saw voles, chipmunks, spiders, geese, robins, crows, seagulls, squirrels, and young painted turtles. My girl learned the difference between the black and white oak, pointed leaves verses rounded, both being part of the beech family. One of our favorite parts of the trail is when the pond is still alongside us, but the hill slopes higher and the moss starts to form, fungus springing to life.... toadstools for fairies or elves to use as furniture or some other ware. This is the magical beech forest and no one can deny the woodland creatures' existence. It's magical here. The beech trees were looming over us and their leaves coverered the trail. The sun filters through the canopy of their tree tops and leads us on our way. The sprites must be playing as berries fall off trees precariously as we walk. We spy an occasional blue jay and off it flies!

I tell my dearest Anna of the days when I walked her in the three-wheeler jogging stroller, lifting it up each step as we climb higher and higher up the trail. Then I tell her how she turns the same way every year on the trail.... she cannot remember, but someday she will and she'll show me the whole way I tell her. We climb up the sandy hill off trail and suddenly we're in a desert-like scape.

It is sandy hills, scrub oaks, scrub pines, what looks like ephedra plants, and strange flowers. Before we find a shady place to rest and snack upon watermelon and other tasty morsels, she spies the Provincetown Monument, our next stop! Then we look knowingly into each other's eyes and hug! We are love and the grounding has happened as we have found our way back to the essence of our true selves and that love that cannot be undone. We are both smiling and off she goes doing cartwheels in the desert-like sands! Hurrah! We have found what we came for!!!

After our refreshing snack and beautiful viewings, we find our way back to the beech forest and come upon the landing on the other side of the trail where we can see the water lilies up close. The first Anna notices is the two young painted turtles sunning themselves on a log near our little seating area. I manage to take another picture, nearly falling into the shallows, featuring these two amphibious beauties chronicling our photo journal. We stay for a short time and sun ourselves like the turtles. Ah, youth! The Monument is still in sight as it sits so high above us.

Finally, we have finished the trail. No geese have hissed at us, although we have seen them do that to other humans before, as was well as the turkeys last year. Don't feed the wildlife I think to myself. We change into our flip flops and drive the scenic route to the Pilgrim Monument.

This is our annual journey to the Monument. It's not so much about seeing the museum, but being in something so old and strong, 100 years old, and being able to climb it together with speed and agility. The Monument is a testament of time and great craftsmanship. We are two of millions who have climbed this mighty place, protected by gargoyles, who stands so tall and like a fortresss storm after mighty storm. Then to see the views from the top! WOW! I take pictures of my Anna and then she takes some of me. After that I get some pictures of her bunny sitting cautiously close to the window with bars. It should be a good picture of her stuffed bunny with a spectacular view of MacMillan Wharf.

On our way down the Monument we both let out big burps, then guffaws as we excuse ourselves. Then I just can't help myself as I caw like a crow a few times as it seems so appropriate. Echoes follow us. I take a picture of Anna in front of our Town's Block in the tower. She's smiling and holding that bunny proudly.

At the bottom of the tower we find comfy seats and relax for a bit. It's so peaceful and the wind is perfectly cool enough. It has been a warm day and the coolness of the height above didn't cool me down. Once again we look into each other's eyes, reflecting love, and come together to hug. This has been a very good day. Soon we must drive home, cook a pizza, eat and then get ready for bed as school starts so very early the next day.

I take one last picture of the Monument. I take it looking up at the American flag at half mast and I can see all the way to the top of the Pilgrim Monument just at it touches the blue sky. This will be a picture and a day to remember. It is the exact opposite of the day I remember 10 years ago. Today has been life affirming and full of love and it has been without fear. I will take as many days like this as I can.

If tomorrow is nice after school, perhaps we'll drive down to Nauset Light Beach and play chicken in the waves.

I will never forget 9/11. Bless everyone who survived and everyone who lost someone to this tragedy whether it was on this day, war related, or anything else. Bless all those who are still at war and their families for their sacrifices. Thank you.

Let us all learn to live, laugh and love.  Peace.